Amber Housley

Wow.

Category: Uncategorized

Wow, so I guess it took a good three years to get my first mean comment on my blog. To the anonymous person "Disappointed in the South" who left the following comment regarding my request for local assistance in day care:

"You’re barely pregnant and already planning who you can pawn the baby off on when she’s only a couple of months old? Sad. Have you not even bothered to consider what other options you have? "

Yeah, you see I have this thing called A JOB. One that supports my family and this baby. It pays things called bills so I can assist in putting a roof over our heads, gas in our cars and food on the tables. It also provides a thing called health insurance that will help this baby grow and come out in this world as healthy as we can hope for. I do have many friends in the Nashville area who have the luxury of being stay-at-home moms. I use the word "luxury" extremely loosely because in fact their job is very very hard work, but they are able to be with their kids at the magic of every major milestone. They have been able to work out an arrangement with their spouses to stay at home probably with some major budgeting and sacrifices. I on the other hand made my own individual choice that I will continue to support my family in the best way I can – and that includes working to support things like building a house. I don’t know how you could consider it wrong to be seeking out the best childcare for my child as soon as possible – ESPECIALLY ONE THAT IS BASED IN A CHURCH ON CHRISTIAN PRINCIPLES.

I went to a home-based daycare since I was 6 weeks old and and guess what? I came out a wonderful fully functioning member of society. After all, Mom didn’t have much choice as a single Mom when there are bills to be paid. My childhood memories of that daycare are some of the best memories I have.

So, thanks Mom for pawning me off. And thanks Disappointed in the South for furthering my belief that there are some really sad people out there who give unsolicted advice to pregnant ladies.

Comments

Trisha says:

It’s amazing the nerve some people have.
Congratulations on the pregnancy and good luck on finding a childcare that you love.

Bless your heart!
The nerve of this idiot..Rrrrrrrrrr!
She is pregnant! Shame on you for the stress you have caused on her!
Shame..shame..shame!
***************
I don’t know of any good day care centers…but I will be on the look out.
I used to keep three little ones in my home..when I was pregnant with Mattie..I wish I could fit it in my busy schedule now..I would babysit for you:)

Kristen says:

A big amen to that! Why is it that some people think the way they raise their children are the ONLY way to raise them?! I, like you, grew up in day care. My single mother worked two sometimes three jobs. My mom is my best friend and we are no less close because of it. And when baby time comes for me and my husband, we will be on the same path you are. To each their own. I think people like your commenter are sad, obnoxious people. And to be honest I feel sorry for THEIR kids for having such a JUDGEMENTAL parent.
But seriously, I think you have a pretty good record going for not having had a bad comment until now. :)

Andrea* says:

Goodness…. there are some terrible people out there. Sorry they took out their misery on you.
On another note, CONGRATS on your pregnancy! :c)

Cheryl says:

Wow! Some nerve… But congrats on your great baby news!!! It’s such a blessing.

gina says:

Well said!
and Congrats :)

gina says:

Well said!
and Congrats :)

Breanne says:

Oh…I am so sorry this pathetic woman had to write such a horrible comment. My child goes to daycare, a decision I felt was the best one for our family, and she in now way is harmed.
Get ready for all the “great” unsolicited advice…just know this woman is obviously very disappointed in her own life.

Candy says:

Don’t let that get to you! My daycare is the best place ever- we totally love them!
Moving past the naegative, CONGRATS!!! :) I am so, so, happy for you!
I have a resource to help you find child care, http://www.childcareaware.org/en/
I work for a Resource & Referral agency here in Michigan and they have similar agencies in your area. Most do not make recommendations but they should have a listing of all the homes and centers who meet your needs!
So darn happy for you, Amber!!!

Aimee says:

Some people thrive on meanness, they should just be ignored. Good luck finding a great daycare!

colleen says:

geez…what business is it of hers. how rude. there’s nothing wrong with being a stay at home mom, but that isn’t always an option or a choice. working mom’s respect SAHMs decisions…it should be a two way street.

Debbie says:

Some people just can’t be happy for others. Just take those comments with a grain of salt, be glad that you have enough forethought to start planning ahead and get the care you want and not have to settle for something that you don’t feel comfortable with when it is time to go back to work. You are to be commended for thinking ahead, planning for your baby and being a great provider for your family. Enjoy your pregnancy….don’t let others upset you!!

Lauren Murray says:

Dear “Disappointed”,
You are entitled to your opinion and to disagree with Amber’s. You do not have to like the fact that she is choosing to work and thus use child care. But regardless of your opinion, why did you feel it necessary to exude such cruelty?Amber would never judge you for not choosing day care. I hope that you realize that your words are hurtful.
Amber, the people that care about you know you and Brandon are going to great and loving parents. I can’t wait to visit. Feel free to forward this comment on to “Disappointed”.
Miss you,
Lauren M

Heather Preckel says:

Well first of all congrats! I wondered when this was going to happen! How fun but sorry you are sick and hopefully it will pass soon. I was sick for my WHOLE nine months so there is some good encouragement for you! Sorry! And it is unbelievable what some people will comment on not even knowing who you really are and I”m sorry that happened. Keep your head up and be confident in knowing you are making the best decision for you and your family and that is all that matters! So happy for you!

Julie says:

Good for you Amber. My “daycare” is part-time and they are called grandparents (my in-laws) and we are so happy and lucky that they help in watching and participating in their grandchildrens growth, etc. I, myself, was in daycare/after-school program from kinder through 4th grade and I have some great memories as well.
Luckily for me I’ve been able to still work with my boss (almost 20 years), yet part-time now (as opposed to FT back in my younger days). I get to have my cake and eat it too. Take care and don’t let the bad mojo comments get the best of you.

Caz says:

Sheesh some people really do know when to stick their ugly noses into other peoples business without knowing the facts!!
I know that if I had a baby I would also need to make the hard decision to return to work soon afterwards to help keep us in a home. The way prices are rising I really don’t see many other options :(
You take care of yourself and your baby and ignore ‘dissapointed’ cause she really doesn’t deserve your attention.
xx

Kim says:

the nerve! very well put!! I stalk you blog daily & truely enjoy your entries thanks for putting yourself out there for ‘others’ to read whether they agree or not.

heidi says:

My son, almost 18 months, has been in daycare since he was 6 months old… and I’ve never regretted the idea, as it’s what works for us. Sorry that some people are very tackless, and feel it’s their duty to impose their views on everyone else :(

Christy Burch says:

Well said Amber. My daughter has been in the same daycare since she was 4 mos old. We knew BEFORE we got pregnant, that me NOT working wasn’t an option and my parents both worked, so our only option was a daycare situtation. Luckily, we have good friends who own one and we’ve never had a problem with it. DD is now 11 and still attending when school is out. SHE LOVES her daycare. She loves her friends and of the 15 or so workers, over 1/2 have been there the whole 11 yrs that DD has been attending and she thinks of them as second moms. I applaud you for looking for the best fit for you so early …. waiting only puts undue stress on you and your family. I leave north/west of Nashville, so I don’t have an Mt.Juliet option for you. I do have a friend at work who’s grandkids have gone to the Gardner School? They are kinda expensive, but I think probably well worth it. Two locations, but not sure if they’d work for ya.
Keep thinking positive. I’ll ask around work because lots of folks live in that area.

Jennifer says:

All i can say is WELL SAID and just remember “what goes around comes around” someday someone will say something to her that is Rude and unwanted and she will learn then to keep her mouth shut if she has nothing nice to say!!

veronica says:

haha and this is why I love you, your blog and attitude!
I read you daily, hahah thanks. I love how well you put it.
I would have said, “screw off” heheh cause well, I am a stay at home mom and I totally understand that for some…it’s JUST not possible. I respect that!

Mike Murray says:

Dear Disappointed in the South (D.I.T.S.),
I’ll be blunt. If you feel so strongly about your snap judgments, based on nothing more than an internet blog, then why stay anonymous? Why not have the courage to suffer the consequences when called to defend your position?
My parents “pawned” me off on grandparents, pre-schools, camp, sports, church, things you would call “sad.” You know what happened? I became a man willing to stand up for what I believe in, just like Brandon did before me, and now his beautiful, strong, determined, principled Amber is prepared to be more courageous than I could ever hope to be. Wife, friend, MOTHER? No tougher job, no greater challenge, no bigger hero. Amber’s child will truly be blessed.
D.I.T.S., Brandon and I have defended your right to your opinion, but I won’t presume to abuse those rights by passing judgment on you. Yet. So come on out. These good people obviously are not afraid. Amber’s certainly not afraid. As for me, I’ve faced worse.
Sincerely,
Captain Michael W. Murray, United States Marine Corps
NAS Pensacola, FL
(I’m in the book)

Carmen says:

Unbelieveable how some individuals want to push thier beliefs on others and then try to chastise those that don’t think like them. Each person makes the decision that they feel works best for thier family…period. I can tell you it is a HUGE sacrifice to go from 2 salaries to one. My hubby and I did it and I can tell you it is tight! I am actually looking forward to starting work again in approx. 2 years. But that choice is not the right one for everyone.
You are doing the right thing seeking out childcare now. Alot of places have a waiting list and you want to find the very best for your bebe!

Aimster - KY says:

Wow – the nerve!
But, I’m very impressed with the “comments to your comments” as well!
Man, did she step on a nerve, or what!?
I, too have VERY fond memories of daycare. If given the option, I’m sure I would’ve enjoyed spending quality time with my Mommy. But, as so many others have said, she was too busy putting food on the table, and paying bills so I could live in a warm, loving home.
Go, AMBER!!

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